Thursday, September 9, 2010

GOODBYE LITTLE FRIEND

Early this morning, I put Timbo in a carrier for his trip to the vet for neutering and vaccinations. As a precaution, I asked for him to first be tested for leukemia and FIV even though I felt sure he was fine. He looked healthy, was very active and loving, and had a good appetite. I truly thought the testing was just a formality, but I was sadly mistaken. Sweet little Timbo tested positive for leukemia today and I had to make the decision to gently and humanely let him go to sleep forever. It's the sort of decision I've had to make more times than I wish to remember.
This little guy really stole my heart in a big way. He went from being a very frightened stray hiding in the bushes, to a sweet purring ball of love. He was starving for affection and finally let himself trust me. I'm so glad he did and I'm happy he was loved and cared for inside my home for this time. He was finally trusting enough to be a lap kitty. I had no idea these would be his last days and I was completely taken off guard this morning.
As I held him and watched him take his last breath, I told him I was sorry we didn't have more time together. I also told him I loved him. Silly? Maybe so, but that's how I feel about the stray kitties that come my way. They are homeless through no fault of their own and they deserve to be loved, cared for, and treated with respect. I tried to do that for Timbo. I hope it was enough.
***************
Thank you for all the kind and comforting messages. This situation truly took me by surprise and I wasn't ready for such an outcome. Your kindness is helping my heart to heal and I appreciate every one of you.

19 comments:

michelle said...

Oh Kady,Im so sorry to hear of your loss.Im sure he knew you loved him and thats not silly at all sweetie.Hang in there.blessings michelle

The Rusty Thimble said...

OH Kady, first off I have to say I read your blog often and should leave more messages. You steal my heart by taking in kitties and loving and caring for them like you do. So sorry for this loss. I know Timbo was happy and loved you. And I know you will truely miss him. you have a large compassionate heart !!!
BIG HUGS
Brenda

dee begg said...

Awww...that's such a shame. Enjoy the sweet memories that you did have with him. It's hard to do the compassionate thing sometimes.

D

PatC - All is Bright said...

No! your aren't silly. That kitty had some good last moments with you although he has gone so soon. You are great lady!

Blessing,
PatC

Anonymous said...

oh so sad.Enjoy the memories I too love cats and dogs.My daughter has 3 herself.He shared with you all the special times.Nice memories he left.Take care!

Heather said...

It's NEVER silly to love an animal....Rest In Peace, Timbo....

Anonymous said...

You are a special person to care so generously for animals the way you do. Timbo was lucky to find you and have those comforting words when they were needed. Take care, April

lakeffect said...

Your blog today brought me to tears. I, too, am a true animal lover. Timbo was a lucky cat to have you love him so completely! Of course you miss him, but there is another cat who needs your love. I hope that cat finds you soon. Now I must disturb my cat's nap to give him an extra hug.

QUILTING IS BLISSFUL, DI said...

My heart is bleeding for you today-Kady!!!!
Hugs, Di

Unknown said...

Kady I'm so sorry - I know how much you loved him - and he knew it. What a lucky kitty to have you care for him before he went to the Rainbow Bridge. Big hugs!

GailinVirginia said...

OH Kady, I can hardly see to type my heart is breaking...he knew you loved him, I know you are hurting...BUT, when diagnosed with Lukemia is putting them down the ONLY thing...I know of contaminating others before he would eventually die...I'm sorry...I wish I hadn't looked into his little trusting eyes...omgod, I am sorry Kady. I was just taken off an anti-depressant and sadness was one of my reasons for taking it..I am truly sorry Kady...bless your heart...Gail the big baby

Linda ★ Parker's General said...

Sweet Kady, I am fighting tears all thru this one. I just knew it wasn't going to be good. Poor Timbo. I know in my heart that it was the right thing to do. It had to be so hard. I have done it once in my life. We had this little cock-a-poo for about 10 years and he started having seizures. I gave him medicine for a long time but that quit working after a while. He was just so upset after a seizure. He had no control over anything and he just looked at me with those big sad eyes. We were all just sick about it but I knew it was time to let him go. I am waiting to see my Corky on the other side because I know he waits for me. Timbo waits for you, chasing butterflies and drinking the finest cream. It is right to put an end to needless suffering. I have 2 really old dogs now. One is blind and the other is almost toothless. I will not let them suffer either. They have been too good a dogs to let that happen. I will pray for your suffering to ease if you'll pray for me to have strength when the time comes to let my boys go.....
★Linda★

Julie - My Primitive Heart said...

Thank you so much Kady for sharing this lovely tale with us!! It brought to mind when we lost our kitty Chaz and my 12 year old held him and told me he had comforted her so many times and she wanted to be the last one he saw!!! How very beautiful to feel such deep love and to know that you did all your could!
Blessings and Peace~
Julie

Cat Haven Craft House said...

Dear Kady,
I am shedding silent tears for you tonight. It is so hard to say goodbye, but I know that you did the right thing for Timbo. Saying prayers of comfort for you and asking for smiles in the morning.
With much sympathy, Cat Haven.

kelley said...

Thank you so much for your devation to the little ones...so sorry you had to lose this fella after his finding your love...big hugs xxx

Anne-Lise at Rag, Tag, Bobtail said...

So sorry, but glad he had you to hold him and love him.

Cat Nap Inn Primitives said...

Oh Kady my heart is breaking..I am crying as I write this as you were just getting to know this sweet little creature...why can't they find a cure for this..my thoughts and prayers are with you..

deb said...

i am so sorry. thanks for taking such great care with the kitty.

dj

Lee Prairie Designs said...

Kady, I am so sorry. It's not easy for putting a special pet to sleep. We have done it once with "Cassie" our little red Cocker it hard we had her for 16 years. Now we have Miss Abbie and I think you have seen her on my blog. The grandchildren gave her to Grandpa and me about 5 years ago when we lost Cassie. Abbie is special too and will not be easy when the day comes but--- I can't think about it.

Love to you and know that we all are thinking of you--Bless your heart. Carolyn